CHIM-CHIMENEY CHIM-CHIMENEY CHIM CHIM CHEROO

Mavril Jones choked to death on carbon monoxide fumes from her coal fire in February 2003 after a jackdaw built a 3ft (90cm) deep nest in her chimney. The 85-year-old widow, from Pontlliw, Swansea , South Wales , had put wire over the chimney, but it had either blown away or been removed by the birds. She was found in her front room with her devoted Jack Russell dog, which survived, alongside her. Daily Express, Sun, 22 Nov 2003.

WILD PARROTS OF TEGELEN HOLLAND

Flatulent parrots killed an animal lover who collapsed and died in Tegelen, Holland . The unnamed victim, whose double-glazed house reeked of expelled wind from dozens of pet birds, had called an ambulance, saying he felt ill — but died before paramedics arrived. The police blamed a combination of the birds' farts and ammonia from their droppings. Sun, 21 Nov 2003.

GOOD LUCK FLAG FOR SALE - AGAIN

A factory owner with money troubles climbed on the roof of his building in central Thailand to raise a flag believed to ward off bad luck — then slipped and fell to his death. Boonchai Lotharakphong, 43, whose factory made sportswear for Nike, died when he slipped off the roof in Lopburi province, 70 miles (113km) north of Bangkok . He had been sold the flag by a Chinese fortune teller. Associated Press, 15 Nov 2003.

MOSES, STOP WITH THE FUCKING PLAGUES ALREADY

Eleven people died and thousands were hospitalized with breathing difficulties after a swarm of grasshoppers invaded central Sudan . Health authorities in Wad Medani, 110 miles (177km) southeast of Khartoum , said an epidemic of lung eczema has afflicted 1,685 people since 22 October. Local resident Joseph Mogum said the grasshoppers gave off a strong smell. Los Angeles Times, 2 Nov 2003.

KILLER WAVES, DUDE

Alasdair Porter, 38, a company director, became the first kite surfer to be killed in Britain when a gust of wind swept him 50ft (15m) along Calshot beach, near Southampton , in August 2003 and hurled him head first into a sea wall at incredible speed”. D.Teleqraph, 17 Oct 2003.

SCALPING TICKET-TAKER

Amusement park operator Doug Mckay, 40, was spraying lubricant on the tracks of the Super Loop 2, a roller coaster-type ride at the Island County Fair on Whidbey Island , Washington State, on 16 August when his long hair got caught on a car full of fairgoers. McKay, co-owner of Paradise Amusements, based in Post Falls, Idaho, was pulled between 25ft and 40ft (7.6m and 12m) into the air and scalped before falling, back-first, onto a fence. He died later in hospital. Associated Press, 17 Aug 2003.

PISSING IN THE RAIN

A 27-year-old Thai man with a prosthetic leg was electrocuted when he urinated near a power pole on the side of a highway in Bangkok . The victim's father told police they had stopped their car near a tollbooth during a rainstorm on 3 July, after nature called. It was thought that the victim had urinated on a flooded ground line, with his prosthetic leg acting as a strong conductor. Queensland Times, 5 July 2003.

BEST MOVIE EVER

A man aged about 50 was found dead in his seat at a cinema in New Delhi on 24 June after the late-night screening of Bollywood's latest horror film, Bhoot ('ghost'), which the director had warned could pose a health risk to those of a nervous disposition. It is a thriller about a possessed housewife, set in a high-rise Mumbai ( Bombay ) apartment. The dead man, discovered by the cinema's cleaning staff, had no identification papers or external injuries. "no one has come forward to claim the body," said a police official. "maybe he got frightened, I don't know."Reuters, 25 June 2003.

LIGHTNING STRIKES TWICE

A college student survived A lightning strike while mountain climbing, but was killed in a second strike. Ryan Sayers, 20, of Colorado Springs , Colorado , and his German girlfriend Katrin Birmann, 24, were climbing a cliff on Steeple Peak , central Wyoming , on 16 June 2003 when lightning hit them 1,500ft (469m) from the summit. Removing their equipment, they decided to sit out the storm, but about an hour later they were hit by a second lightning strike, and Sayers fell about 300ft (90m) into a ravine. Birmann, who suffered minor burns, found her boyfriend dead when she rappelled down to him. A rescue team recovered the body the next day. An examination determined he died from the lightning strikes, not the fall. Associated Press, 20 June 2003.

SHOCKING

Willie Wagner, nine, was walking across the town street bridge in Columbus , Ohio , on 22 may when he touched a lamp-post and was electrocuted. More than two weeks later, city officials were still unable to say what had happened. No current had been detected on the lamppost or chain-link fence close by. All wires and fuses associated with the lamp were inspected and found to be working and properly insulated. Excavations to examine the two electric transmission lines beneath the concrete sidewalk revealed no defects that would allow moisture inside. Biomedical analysts were trying to determine precisely where the electricity entered and exited the boy's body. [AP], 12 June 2003

NOTHING TO SING ABOUT

Tran Guoc Du, 23, teacher in the southern Vietnamese province of Binh Thuan , died instantly on 1 May when his karaoke microphone short-circuited while he was singing in his home. Sydney Daily Telegraph, 02 May 2003

THE SKY IS FALLING

Kimberley Mason, 20, was a passenger in a car driving down Frederick Street in Detroit at 2am on 18 April when a bullet crashed through the roof and hit her in the head. She died later in hospital. "It appears that it was a bullet coming down from the sky after having been fired in the air," said homicide inspector Craig Schwart. Detroit Free News, 19 April 2003.

NOT YOUR AVERAGE HIT-AND-RUN

A man walking his dog was run down and killed by his own car on 23 march. His Nissan Primara hurtled down Portsdown Hill, near Portsmouth , and hit him after he had left it in a car park. Police believe the handbrake had slipped. "it appears as if he tried to stop the car by standing in front of it," said a spokesman. D.Mirror, 24 March 2003

HANGING AROUND THE HOUSE

Kieran Duggal, 53, lent forward to unlock his front door with a key tied round his neck. He slipped and became tangled, accidentally throttling himself. Jobless Mr Duggal was found dead outside his home in Balham, southwest London . D.Express, 19 February 2003

TAGGING ALONG FOR THE RIDE

A Finnish restaurant employee was driving home at 4am on 11 February when he noticed that his car was rather sluggish. After a few hundred yards he stopped to investigate and found a dead man under the car. According to the police, the deceased, aged about 30, was lying under the car before it was driven off. The vehicle bore no trace of a collision. Nya Aland (Finland) - 12 February 2003.

FREQUENT FLYER MILES RESTRICTIONS

Two Caucasian men in their thirties dropped from the undercarriage of an Air France Boeing 777 as it approached Pudong International airport in Shanghai on 24 January after a flight from Paris . One of the men smashed through the roof of a house, leaving a large gash in the roof. The men, who showed signs of frostbite, had probably frozen to death in the wheel wells of the aircraft during the 11-hour journey, dropping from the sky when the landing gear was deployed. Neither carried identification. Stowaways falling from aircraft wheel wells are usually escaping from developing countries and trying to reach the west. New York Times, 25 Jan 2003.

FOWL PLAY

A rooster, about to be set loose for a cock-fighting bout in Zamboanga in the Philippines, attacked its handler with the razor-sharp steel spikes strapped to its legs. The spikes cut the man's thigh and groin, causing him to bleed profusely in front of shocked spectators. He died on the way to hospital. Associated Press - 15 January 2003